Friday, September 07, 2007

I still can't give my lost baby a farewell

A DISTRAUGHT teenager who suffered a miscarriage six weeks ago is still waiting to find out the sex of her baby.

More than a month ago, Faye Wharfe, of Fairfax Crescent, Southowram, took up Calderdale Royal Hospital's offer to find out whether her child was a boy or a girl, and have a cremation carried out with a memorial service.

The 18-year-old says has still heard nothing from the hospital.

But they have invited her meet its head of midwifery and experts say tests to discover the baby's sex could take some time.

Ruth Benderatik, from the Miscarriage Association, said: "It would not be unusual for such things to take some time.

"Sometimes when a baby is so premature, a blood or skin sample needs to be sent for chromosome tests to tell what sex the baby is. This can take up to six weeks.

"Organising a cremation for the baby can also take some time for various reasons.

"Staff at any hospital should sit down and explain to the mother what will happen and how long it could take."

Faye suffered a miscarriage when she was 16 weeks pregnant.

She was taken to the hospital and endured a traumatic five-hour ordeal, which involved giving birth to the stillborn baby.

"It's constantly on my mind because I can't stop thinking about where my baby could be and what's happened to my child," she said.

"I know I'll never be able to forget but I'm not able to start moving on. It's really hard."

Faye and her boyfriend had already thought of names for the baby – Harvey Ryan for a boy and Caitlin for a girl.

"My best friend is pregnant and I can't bring myself to see her," said Faye.

"I don't want other women to go through what I've been through."

A Calderdale and Huddersfield NHS Foundation Trust spokesman said: "The is the first time we have been made aware of this patient's distress and we are very sorry to hear about her concerns.

"We have now been in touch with her and have arranged for her to meet the head of midwifery this week to discuss the issues that she has raised."


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